Wednesday, March 11, 2009

If I may...

At this rate I'm going to have to change the name of this blog to, "Questions about Potty Training." But if you don't mind...I have one more. And I'm making it easy on you and putting it into multiple choice format.

So here's our status with potty training:

- After about 5 days of training, we had gotten to the point where she went 2 days without wet accidents, but that was without...ahem...bottoms.

-Everytime I try to have her wear panties...she has accidents. She will start to go a little and THEN run to the potty.

-During all the trips out to the new house, I could not risk an accident, so I put her in a diaper. She really is not at the place where she can tell me that she needs to go.

-If we are hanging out at the house, I will ask her periodically if she needs to go potty. EVERY time she says, "no phank you." Sometimes she will have an accident 2 minutes later.

-She is actually doing GREAT at pooping in the potty the past few days. We've figured out how to make her comfortable and she's had several successes and no accidents since last week. (Sometimes she goes in her diaper during nap, but that doesn't bother me if we're having successes while she's awake).

So here's the thing: we've been at this for 12 days. We're still having lots of accidents, and we're nowhere near being able to go out in panties. And if things go well with the house inspection this weekend, the next couple of months are gonna be CRAZY with change. So here are the options as I see them:

a) Continue full force and try really hard not to go anywhere until we get this thing under control (don't know if this one is possible).

b) Work on it when we happen to be home, wear diapers when we go out, don't make a big deal about it (how long will this go on?).

c) Take a break completely and go back to diapers full time until after we move. Start again maybe in June when things are settled a bit.

But wait! One more factor to consider before you push that button!! In order to start preschool in September (Katy will be 3 years and 3 months), she has to be potty trained with no help required. This was true at every school I visited. To be honest, this is the biggest pressure I feel, otherwise I wouldn't be concerned and would just go with the, "no one goes to kindergarten in diapers" philosophy.

Ok, thanks for your thoughts...I sincerely appreciate them...


Oma Froehle said...

I vote for B. You can't stay home until she's trustworthy. Even grownups sometimes have accidents. (Ask any woman over 50.)

Break down and get pull-ups for when you go out. It's better than reverting to diapers and is still "grown up."

You are going to be a bit stressed out during the next few months, and she will probably do worse on days you are tense. When this happens, ignore it and start over the next day.

You can't "engineer" potty training. You encourage it until it happens.

bluedaisy said...

I would probably do "B". Now, some people might say this isn't good due to lack of consistency, etc. And I am reading that "Potty Training in One Day" book that probably wouldn't agree with it. But you do have a stressful time coming up and if you try to stay full force, I see that stress spilling over into the potty training. I think you still have enough time to make this work before preschool. I also don't think that potty training can be forced- we are going to give it a good try this weekend and see if we can continue into the week. If I have the nerve to follow thru, I'll share our experience. This is the one milestone that I am not at all into- but I desperately want to get one child out of diapers. To save money and the earth...Good luck with whatever option you end up choosing.

Erin said...

If it were me, I'd go with B. In fact, that's pretty much what we do with Calum. I have a VERY LAZY attitude toward potty training, though. Emphasis on the LAZY.

Do you use pull-ups? We get our at Target. They're cheaper there and are much easier when you're out running around.

Weed said...

I vote for B, just because A didn't work for us, and B is what we're trying now! But I have nothing to back it's just what seems right at the moment for us, and probably for you, too, with everything you have going on right now.

Wishing us BOTH some success....

Pam said...

I too vote for B.

Just my 2 cents: let Katy guide you with this. She'll do it when she's ready. I have tried to coerce and bully and steer Jack and at the end of the day he's done it in his own independent time. Now he refuses to use the potty seat and I have to watch to make sure his skinny ass doesn't fall in the bowl!

Mommy Daisy said...

We mostly did B. I finally bought Pull Ups for outtings and nap/bedtimes. It seemed to work well for us. And it didn't take long at all for him to stay dry during outtings or ask to go potty. We have fewer accidents out of the house than in the house. And he's still not there 100%, but it's getting much better.

I've been working on the independent potty thing too, because he can't move to the 3/4 year old nursery at church until he can go on his own. He's not there yet, so we'll keep at it.

I think you're doing great Emily. Just go with the flow.

Allecia said...

We started potty training during a VERY stressful time for us too (moved to a rental, me expecting, buying another house and moving...AGAIN!). Keep trying, but, as everyone else has said, it will come when it comes (we had success, then set backs, then accidents, and now he's even wearing underware to bed!!). We did the pull-ups while we were out and it worked well for us. My 2 cents are to encourage and not force and you'll both be happier. She's smart, she'll get it.

Kate said...

B sounds nice. I think you just take it day by day and don't worry about it. If she's made this much progress in 12 days, you'll have her trained by August if you start in June. But it doesn't hurt to ask her if she has to go, just to get her thinking about it. Then again, don't listen to ANYTHING I say because I have the kid who "trained" at 3 years and 9 months and still wears diapers at night because he sleeps too soundly. (We'll be working on night time training as soon as it's warm enough to have just sheets to wash.)

Oma Froehle said...

May I see some pictures of my grand babies, please? Oma needs a fix.

Grammy said...

I vote for can't stop now! When you need to go out..put her panties on with a plastic panty over. You will avoid total messes but she will still feel uncomfortable and know she has wet. Bring lots of extras with you! I would not put diapers back on her. She is a BIG GIRL now!!!
OH how we love her and her brother!!!(and their mommy and daddy!) Grammy and Papa John

Dutcher said...

Hey, EM! I'm going to vote B or even C. Because:
1. The last time I spoke with you, you seemed pretty stressed about potty training. The goal isn't to make the whole family unhappy.

2. Starting again in June will still give you three months to get it done.

Will was hugely motivated when he learned that he couldn't move up to the "big kid" class until he stopped having accidents. Good luck!

Kelsey said...

I do remember feeling like we couldn't go anywhere for a while, and having some unfortunate accidents. We had something like a combination of pull ups and washable diapers - they were underwear with tightish leg holes and a plastic coating around them. That isn't a very good explanation - sorry!

I like the idea of using pull-up type things when out and about - they are easy enough to pull up and down when necessary.