The mind of a three year old

In the car:

Katy: Mom, why does that sign tell us to go up? We can't go up!

Me: What? Which sign?

K: OH! Maybe it means to go straight. Don't turn this way or that way, just go straight.

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Seeing a picture of our family opening Christmas presents:

K: Mommy, whose birthday is that?

M: Nobody's birthday. Don't you remember? At Christmas we give each other presents.

K: Who gets to open them?

M: Everyone. You will get some, and mommy, daddy, and David. We give some to others and we get to open some.

K: (excited) Is Christmas TODAY?

M: No, it's next month.

K: Oh, yeah, the next time we change the calendar.

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Pulling into parking lot of Chinese Restaurant:

K: Mommy, what does that sign say? Oh, it says, "the rice place."